Monday, November 9th, 2009 | Filed under Comic 50 Comments

Delhi haters tour. How to act like a complete idiot when travelling to Delhi.

Another tip: Remind EVERY Delhi resident you meet, how unsafe the city is and how rude the people are.

Previous instances of regional hate:

Photo credits: Khan Market photo by Sarika from Flickr, who was kind enough to let me use it, and sent a full size photo too. A virtual brownie for her. Habitat Center photo by L. Shyamal who is making the world a better place by contributing media to Wikipedia under CC. The other photos are mine. The views expressed are attributed to the voices, not me. This comic was inspired by a very old Mad Magazine feature on New York.

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  1. 1
    Anonymous // November 9th, 2009 at 9:44 am


  2. 2
    Prats // November 9th, 2009 at 9:48 am

    funny !! but next time .. tell the good things in delhi :)

  3. 3
    Sahil Rizwan // November 9th, 2009 at 9:53 am

    Brilliant! XD

    Also on the tourist’s ‘Delhi-NCR Must-Experience List’ – Take directions from random person on road who will inevitably give you detailed instructions to your destination, including which gol-chakkars to take 5 miles down the road, even though the first time he found out that a place like that existed in the city was when you mentioned it.

  4. 4
    nidhesh // November 9th, 2009 at 10:05 am

    So the views expressed in this comics are not yours. What is the use of going to this length about the views of the so called voices(whoever voices they are) unless you are from History channel or have some counter views?

  5. 5
    Saad Akhtar (Author) // November 9th, 2009 at 10:07 am

    @nidhesh: Underwear too tight? Loosen up bro, it’s Monday but still….

  6. 6
    Rex // November 9th, 2009 at 10:34 am

    Oh YES!
    High time Delhi got some loving..I’m also sick of people complaining about it.
    Your comic rocks..wish you’d update more often!

  7. 7
    rahul // November 9th, 2009 at 10:50 am

    expected something better..but nice!!

  8. 8
    nidhesh // November 9th, 2009 at 10:52 am

    k, I am Done. Nice Post.

  9. 9
    Rockus // November 9th, 2009 at 10:55 am

    Good one!

  10. 10
    chandan // November 9th, 2009 at 11:55 am

    ha ha fvck1ng hilarious :D

    may be we hate all cities lol

  11. 11
    asadkhan // November 9th, 2009 at 12:00 pm

    Delhi is not a place to hate.learn from those who left it in 1947.dilli ke na the kooche auraq e mussiwr the— jo shakl nazr aai tasweer nazr aai.

  12. 12
    Xacarob // November 9th, 2009 at 12:14 pm

    What this comic needs is an old south park type ending.

    after the guy gets himself beaten-up for being an asshole he says:

    “you know i’ve learned something today
    Delhi might be a cesspool of aggressive, self-centered, road raging,panju-jaat-madrasi-mallu-serd-bong-etc. bastards, but it sure is better than bombay or calcutta or all those other loser places.”

    *all above text is the opinion of manbearpig*

  13. 13
    vadakkus // November 9th, 2009 at 12:50 pm

    Yay! someone at last finally had the good sense to separate Mallus from Madrasis :)

    BTW FYF Rocks..!

  14. 14
    | Balu | // November 9th, 2009 at 2:03 pm

    I visited Delhi and did not complain about it.. But I did complain about my friend who refused to take to any of these places, except Khan market (kakori kabab in winter= yummy^2)

  15. 15
    @nks // November 9th, 2009 at 3:18 pm

    you are stepping on the nerve … dude on the nerve …. aaaarrggghhh

    @Xacarob awesome … some up… I so love south park that if it was a women i would marry it and hump it all night long …

  16. 16
    Saad Akhtar (Author) // November 9th, 2009 at 3:20 pm

    @nks: Take a towel, draw a face on it and give it a joint. Call it towelie and hump it.

    Send pictures.

  17. 17
    Hades // November 9th, 2009 at 5:47 pm

    how unsafe the city is and how rude the people are.

    I love these comics of yours where you tell the brutal truth.

  18. 18
    Bala // November 9th, 2009 at 9:02 pm

    aargh..these delhi…interaction designers…don’t use marathi in their cartoons…sad they can’t be published in b’bay :P

  19. 19
    Alex // November 9th, 2009 at 9:29 pm


  20. 20
    love-separating-words-with-hyphens // November 10th, 2009 at 1:32 am

    lol-but why-the perceived-muslim-bashing, bro? yer-tryin-to-get extra-over-minoritystatus-conscious?

  21. 21
    will-make-it-readable // November 10th, 2009 at 1:34 am

    lol but why the perceived-muslim-bashing, bro? yer tryin to get extra-over-minoritystatus-conscious?

  22. 22
    Rohan // November 10th, 2009 at 1:38 am

    Delhi sucks. Chennai sucks. Mumbai sucks. Kolkata sucks.
    Sucks rules! Sucks sells!! \m/

  23. 23
    Sudhang Shankar // November 23rd, 2009 at 3:23 pm

    Loved the Khan Market one! You should have included a walled-city panel too. Followed by the guy getting a heart attack.

  24. 24
    naren // November 24th, 2009 at 9:18 pm

    Maaan, this comic rocks! Complete brilliance! I could have written every line myself (if I had thought of them, that is, which I wouldn’t in several lifetimes)

  25. 25
    aarti // November 27th, 2009 at 12:42 pm

    why the comment on gay designers? why call them ‘butt pirates’? totally unnecessary and in bad taste.

  26. 26
    Saad Akhtar (Author) // November 27th, 2009 at 1:16 pm

    @aarti: It’s not my view on gay designers. Or any gay person. The whole narrative is from the point of view of someone who finds things to hate about everything. I have nothing against gay people. Check out the comic on hypocrisy against gay people.

    Similarly, I have nothing against the government preserving Muslim monuments. Lets preserve everything we can, regardless of who built it. But I’ve heard these views many times. And they are stupid and ignorant.

  27. 27
    prerna // November 27th, 2009 at 7:31 pm

    Would have loved the comic if I was not a hard core Delhiwallah :) I just love Delhi with all it’s shortcomings.

  28. 28
    Farah Rahman // December 6th, 2009 at 10:40 am

    Truly hilarious. Loved every bit of it.

  29. 29
    I-dont-get-it // December 7th, 2009 at 6:08 pm

    I don’t get it.
    You’re both racist and sexist.
    So you’re hating on everything and everyone?
    People like you are the only ones making anywhere ” worse “

  30. 30
    Saad Akhtar (Author) // December 7th, 2009 at 6:39 pm

    @idontgetit: You know what, this is the most misunderstood comic on this site. And I’m not going to play the joke explainer anymore. I’m not racist and sexist, try the other comics. You might like them more. :)

  31. 31
    Jabberwock // December 7th, 2009 at 6:39 pm

    To the last commenter: your comment should really have ended after the first four words. Nothing else in it makes any sense.

  32. 32
    Jabberwock // December 7th, 2009 at 6:41 pm

    Saad: seems we posted at the same time. And yes, joke-explaining doesn’t work beyond a point – you can’t make everything idiot-proof.

    Keep up the good work!

  33. 33
    rhys // December 7th, 2009 at 8:00 pm
  34. 34
    dash // December 12th, 2009 at 7:30 pm

    fuckin nazi..
    u got nothin better to do than insult cities…?

  35. 35
    Iddy Albatross // December 18th, 2009 at 12:35 am

    LOVED this one!! The last two tips… mindblowing :D Cheers…

  36. 36
    I hate you guyz // December 22nd, 2009 at 7:27 pm

    hey ya butt lickers.. i c some awesome work going on here..goodies.. but why the meecrab spare other cities when they are equally annoying.
    we are 1 billion..if we just fart together v can own the world. Blast to the glory!

    *Chinese cant fart.All they do is haiyya!

  37. 37
    Saad Akhtar (Author) // December 22nd, 2009 at 9:02 pm

    @ihateyouguyz: One can make comics one city at a time, can’t one? And given the bad response over this comic, I don’t think I’m touching other cities. And anyway I don’t have the inside scoop on Mumbai or Bangalore.

    And oh, it’s not butt lickers here. I’m the only one who does this stuff. And by this stuff I mean making comics, not licking butts.

  38. 38
    Nadeem // December 24th, 2009 at 10:33 am

    aww man dont stop u r doin a gr8 job! To hell with all the ‘-ism’ lovers. Keep it up Sod..long live United Atheist Alliance.

  39. 39
    Amit // January 1st, 2010 at 4:50 am

    I bet a mumbaikar can hardly dare to so openly criticize his own city. We Delhites can, and that’s something to be proud of. We can be vocal and open to our problems and that can lead us to rectify them.

    Anyways, amazing humor. Just loved it !

  40. 40
    Aftab Ahmad // January 5th, 2010 at 5:09 pm

    Some facts are true. I liked your fashion dictation comment.

  41. 41
    Siddharth Tiwary // January 15th, 2010 at 6:13 pm

    Wow simply loved the work and the comments, thanks for giving me my dose of sarcasm which i readily pass on to others, the only flaw I find after reading the comments is that your brand of humor works only with intelligent people.

    @Dash Good to know that your IQ is less than that of a preschooler enjoy your Delhi dude this attitude is the reason we have emerged as the most racially hated people ranking even higher than Jews and afros

  42. 42
    Dash // January 15th, 2010 at 11:09 pm

    @Siddharth: yeah right…ur the one taking a narrow view n stereotyping people and I’m the one who supposedly has the “pre-schooler” attitude…do the country a favour and go live abroad if u hate the cities so much…

  43. 43
    Saad Akhtar (Author) // January 15th, 2010 at 11:30 pm

    Awe.. come on guys. No fighting. :) Just a comic…

  44. 44
    Siddharth Tiwary // January 16th, 2010 at 12:16 pm

    @Dash sorry if my post was hurtful, I think I am suffering from Tharoorosis a.k.a the foot in the moth syndrome in common language,I may say I am hurt at the way press misreported the incident:D

    To avoid the re-occurrence of such a distasteful post I will take lessons in realpolitik from Dr. Henry Kissinger.

    PS: I need not to go abroad as I live in Chattisgarh, anatomically the rectum of India and a foreign nation as far as Govt of India is concerned, however regrettably it is closer to sub Saharan Africa than other places of my liking.

    Sorry for being a occasional sociopath

  45. 45
    Siddharth Tiwary // January 16th, 2010 at 12:17 pm

    @Dash sorry for typos

  46. 46
    Abhishek // March 28th, 2010 at 1:10 pm

    What a fantastic comic!! What brazen truth you have conveyed!!! The metros of India, the so-called ‘modern’ cities, these are in fact inhabited by rotten people (read Elites/Socialites) who think that aping western culture and kicking their own is the best way to be ‘modern’. Infact most of the Delhi’s ‘High-society’ is nothing but a bunch of pathetic and hollow people who are the ones responsible for this state of Delhi and other metros. These cities are quickly getting corrupted by the muck called LGBT culture and something must be done to stop this degradation ASAP.

    Fantastic comments about the ‘Secular Government’, Gay designers and ‘Intellectual Jhola wearing women’. Hope we get rid of these somehow to restore some sanity in the society. I weep for Delhi, for what condition it is in. :(

  47. 47
    Siddhu // April 14th, 2010 at 1:15 am

    Brilliant comic, Saad.

    Sadly, though, from reading the comments section, I can see how taking offence seems to have become India’s national sport.

    Have you received any death threats yet? People who’d want to kill you from this comic should include people who don’t like the secular government and think you’re making fun of them, people who like the secular government but can’t spell irony, Hindus who think you’re making fun of bigoted Hindus, Muslims who think you’re making fun of Babur (yes, I know it was Humayun, but accuracy is hardly important, is it?), people who think all white foreigners in India are racist, white foreigners in India who aren’t racist and are hurt by your characterisation and their lack of irony, white foreigners in India who are racist and would want to kill you anyway, George W. Bush, Shashi Tharoor, Lalit Modi, and Osama bin Laden.

    I apologise for this list not being as exhaustive as it should be. I can notice immediately that I missed Raj Thackeray.

    P.S.: I’m offended too. I can’t remember what about, though. Please consider yourself death threated.

  48. 48
    Siddhu // April 14th, 2010 at 1:19 am

    @Abishek Yes, it’s all the fault of the gays and the Muslims. Did you know that evil gay people, encouraged by liberal homo-lovers like Hitler started World War II.

    You missed the Jews, though. They’re usually responsible for everything.

  49. 49
    Ram // September 6th, 2010 at 10:21 am

    Aaah! Dilli meri jaan! To all those delhiite f#**@@s (if you’re from some other unbeknownst city, you’re forgiven – thank god for small happinesses)who claim they didn’t get the message in this comic, put your hand on your heart (Geeta pe haath rakho, seeta pe nahin) ande swear that you haven’t done even one of those things in the entire time you’ve spent in Delhi (and no, I’m not talking about the new delhi-cateseen around the block)

  50. 50
    Alain_Delon // April 7th, 2012 at 9:55 pm

    Delhi would not be such a bad place if the people were better. Delhi is divided into – upper class (all nouveau riche and tackiest people in the world who wouldn’t wear anything if it doesn’t have a label boldly visible on their ugly fat bodies), middle class (indians who wannabe americans…obsessed with the cable tv culture…rock music…smoking…drugs..sex..just because its all “cool”), and the poor “poor” people (all serving the upper and middle classes – these are the majority you see on the streets but never NOTICE them really because they are so insignificant and SO MANY and yet so invisible).

    There is one more class of people in Delhi…”the artsy fartsy intellectual mentals”.. they aren’t really intellectual but they THINK they are….those fab india wearing women with big black hair and bindis and a big ugly jhola bag with lots of silver and bronze jewelery..they are the worst so much attitude and so stupid.

    I think people in other parts of India are at least more NORMAL….delhites are the most disgusting people i’ve come across…the rich in Delhi are classless completely…their parties are boring as hell and they are physically and mentally sick… the author of this blog forgot to mention Emporio Mall… well that’s a new concept really think it was made after this blog was written…that’s where all the haggarred middle age wives of cheating fat husbands sit, shop, bitch and eat all day long…all of them look the same though…dress the same and all have fake blonde hair…they all carry bags which have some label printed all over the thing and i’ve seen a lot of them wearing juicy couture track suits – thinking it’s a status symbol when it says in big golden letters “JUICY COUTURE” printed on their shapeless indian ASS.

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